Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Vego-pragmatism F.A.Q.

What the hell is a vego-pragmatist?
A vego-pragmatist is someone who agrees philosophically with many tenets of veganism and makes many vegan choices, but due to personal circumstances, is not able to adopt a purely vegan lifestyle.

How many vego-pragmatists are there in the world?
Probably millions, though I might be the only one identifying himself as such, given that I invented the term myself only a few hours ago.

Is it pronounced vejo- or veego-?
Whichever you like. I'm going with veego because, while I'm not vegan, I do want my lifestyle's name to evoke veganism. I admire vegans very much.

Why name it at all?
Good question. I want to have a conversation starter: Hot dogs are ready. No thanks. Why not? I don't eat hot dogs. Why not? I'm a vego-pragmatist. What the hell is a vego-pragmatist? . . .

So you want to browbeat others into adopting your alien lifestyle?
Not at all. I just like talking about whatever topic I'm thinking about at a given time, whether my interlocutor is interested in it or not. I've always been that way and people keep listening. Right now I'm thinking about improving my diet. Other people can eat whatever they want to eat.

How's it going so far?
Ask me in a week. Today I cooked up the last pound of hamburger in the fridge and finished off a bag of shredded cheddar cheese. The last of our milk will go in my breakfast cereal tomorrow. We have a few slices of American cheese but I'll use that to make grilled cheese sandwiches for Mrs. DMG to take to work. We have mayonaise to last until I can find a suitable substitute, which shouldn't be too hard. after that, it's off to the races! The first big challenge, this coming Wednesday, will not be a challenge at all. I will be in the break room celebrating 90 days without a recordable incident by eating a banana and a crunchy gala apple while every one of my co-workers sickens herself on Papa John's pizza. I can't wait!

10 comments:

Martijn said...

This is superb. I want to be a vego-pragmatist too!

Or a vego-munchhausen. Or a vego-munchhausen-by-proxy. And I want a Vega banjo.

Sorry for jolliness: great post.

Martijn said...

Hey, shit... now my name is Anon. because I set up another blog for which I thought it wise if my name was not all that perciptible. I should have made a blog with another provider I think. I'll change it back later, but this was still me, Martijn.

Jen T said...

Um...who are you and what have you done with my brother?

marc said...

Egads, Dave. I can't believe I've been reduced to visiting your blog as some sort of lame substitute for Mike's futility blog. Maybe it has something to do with the Pope resigning.. or the Swiss guard abandoning their post. Or Martijn signing in as Anon.

Martijn said...

Hey Marc, yes, the signs of the collapse of a civilisation are numerous. Meteors, the Pope, the abdication of our Queen Beatrix... And our Great Leader has left us and we're all wandering alone in the desert, lifting up rocks and mumbling 'come out come out where ever you are.' But perhaps it's healthy for us.

And Dave's blog has been a fabulous little cabin in the woods for me for many years. No substitute but a vacation house. I love it here.

Jen, your brother may have fallen victim to Runners Madness. Perhaps it's time for another search party... Gather helmet lights and lumps of meat everyone! Dave, we're coming to the rescue!

Martijn

(I'll try to change it back to Martijn. I can, now that I have tweeked my new blog into something a little less criminal and better protected against libel indictments.)

Dave Renfro said...

Jen T: This is the Anti-Dave just filling in while Dave is on the toilet.

Dave Renfro said...

Marc: Trust me, this blog has no delusions of being an adequate substitute for UF Mike's blog. Not even in the same league. But hey! I can tell you anything you want to know about the D.C. punk scene!

Thanks for stopping by, pal!

Dave Renfro said...

Little cabin in the woods, I like that! Him Martijn.

Martijn said...

Hi Dave! (Just to see if I'm back to my self.)

marc said...

Holy erwtensnert! Martijn is back to being Martijn.