Saturday, January 16, 2010

Rapid Deceleration



10 comments:

carl duewall said...

looks like you'll need a new alternator for sure.

Anonymous said...

Geez, you okay? A word to the wise. "Wall" means stop. The same goes for "tree" and "telephone pole."

You'll probably need a new "I Heart Kayaking" bumpersticker too.


UF Mike

Anonymous said...

Holy crap, dude! I take it from the fact you're still typing that you are all right...

Seth.

Anonymous said...

Unless he's typing with new prosthetic hands!

UF Mike

Dave Mows Grass said...

Hey Mike, does "out-of-control Ford Expedition" mean stop, too? You know, this is the type of event that would really piss me off just a few years ago, but not now. I've changed. I've decided it is unreasonable to expect new Americans from the Marshall Islands to be able to drive competently on ice. Driving on ice is a skill that can only be learned on Nemo Road heading northwest from Rapid City, South Dakota, and Rapid City, South Dakota does not have any chicken plants. It has a meat-packing plant, which means beef-packing plant. Rapid City has no jobs! I've also decided it is just and proper that Marshallese people be allowed to come here and work without a visa, given that we nuked their entire island nation into a mound of coconut isotopes decaying by half every few thousand years. Finally, I've decided it is just and proper that these fine people be allowed to drive back and forth to work, even on ice, because I really like chicken. I mean that about fine people, by the way. They're the salt of the earth! And my sternum will heal with time. I just stayed at home for a few days reading Balzac and trying not to breathe.

Hey Seth! Would I even recognize Nemo Road any more? I found it on Google Earth and it didn't look too built up.

Hey Carl. That's the flux capacitor you see in the photo, not the alternator.

Anonymous said...

Dave,

You'd recognize Nemo Road just fine, but I'm afraid there's no more beef packing plant. The whole shebang burnt down about seven years ago.

On the bright side, downtown RC smells much, much better!

Seth.

Anonymous said...

You're a good man, Dave. I can sympathize with the Marshallese people not because my home was nuked into nothingness, but because I also lack the ability to drive on ice and once drifted into the opposing lane on Kelly Drive in Philadelphia, smashing another car smack on the nose. The driver of said car was not as understanding as you are. Frankly, he whined, then sued. Some people just can't handle being hit head on by an idiot.

UF MIKE

Anonymous said...

An accident on an icy road is something you have to understand...but driving without a driver lisence and no insurance is unforgiving!!!It's an act of being STUPID.GRRRRRRRRRRR!!!

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Anonymous said...

Don't stop posting such articles. I love to read articles like that. By the way add some pics :)